Wonderful Blog

It would like to put a quick plug out into cyberspace for the blog of my dear, dear friend Blythe. Please go visit her Little Corner of the World. You'll be glad you did!

In related thoughts, Blythe put up a link to a new book that, on the surface, seems insightful. The Unguide to Dating is Camerin Courtney's new book that she has written with Todd Hertz. Here is a quick look at the first chapter. From what I've read of it -- it's smack on target. I'll let you know more after I've read the entire book. I appreciate the fact that this isn't a "ten steps to easy dating" book. A) those books are ridiculous, and B) they never work anyway. I think they are usually based on one person's idealized version of their own life. People are complicated, complicated creatures. There is no formula to make any type of relationship work. (That doesn't mean I don't think there are principles that help relationships -- I do.)

When I read a book like this, I'm not looking for a solution. I don't need my singleness to be "fixed." No, what I really want in a book like this is to know that I am not alone. I want to know that there are women out there who are struggling with the same thing. In fact, it's also very encouraging to know that there are men out there who struggle with singleness. I think that sometimes we, as single women, feel hopeless, marginalized and left-over. As if there was some sort of "fruit stand of women" in college and the good ones got picked and we are the discounted, bruised and over-ripe fruit that's left.

I am an independent, competent and somewhat attractive woman in my early thirties. I have a good job, own my own home and have fairly healthy relationships with my friends and family. I love God and am confident in both His provision and His love for me. However, there a corner of my heart that just wants to cry out to the world, "Pick me... please pick me." It's nice to hear the voices of other women and men who live the same struggle. Who want to be married, but also want to be obedient to what God is telling them to do. Right now, God has me at this point in my life. I've moved on from other places and am living here. One of the places I am living is singleness. I don't want to be always looking on the horizon to see if a move is coming. I want to truly live here. To reach out to others and be the single woman that God wants me to be. To live His plan. Of course, that's much easier said than done and the squeaky little voice is still crying, "Pick me...please?"

Okay - that ended up to be a lot longer than I was intending. As I look back over what I have written, I am thinking -- "oooohh, maybe you shouldn't reveal this much, Jill." But you know, this is where my heart is today. Tomorrow it might be in another spot. I want to welcome you to come and sit on my metaphorical steps with me. Come sit on the concrete and look at playground with me. Here is my life...comment if you wish. :-)